Couples therapist and plus-size dating coach Krista Niles joins us to discuss statistics and misconceptions about body size and romantic relationships, how to navigate dating after being in a relationship with someone who says cruel things about your body, great strategies for creating a dating profile, what to do if you’re struggling to find a therapist, and so much more! Plus, Christy answers a listener question about how to cope when you’re surrounded by people who buy in to diet culture.
Krista Niles, couples therapist and dating coach, created the Curvy Cupid Course in 2016 to help women of all sizes start writing their love stories. Krista is a strong believer in the transformative power of love, and experienced firsthand the stuckness, discouragement, and hopelessness that can accompany dating as a plus-size woman. Through the Curvy Cupid Course, she teaches a step-by-step intentional approach to dating that encourages perseverance and nurtures confidence skills -- even within a deeply flawed system of fatphobia and poorly-designed dating apps. Find her online at CurvyCupidCourse.com.
Why food was viewed as dangerous in Krista’s family
How food deprivation creates a sense of “addiction” to food, even though food itself is not addictive
How Krista discovered the anti-diet approach to food and body
How Christy was misdiagnosed with PCOS
Krista’s experience with a rapid change in weight coincidentally after starting to make peace with food, and how it affected her relationship with her body
Krista’s diagnosis of PCOS
How insulin resistance affects hunger and movement
Why the goal of intuitive eating is never weight loss
The trauma of dieting
The importance of changing who you follow on social media
The isolation that Krista felt being fat-positive without having a sense of community support
The challenges of dating while living in a larger body
How Krista’s experience as a therapist and personal experiences shaped the way she created her Curvy Cupid Course
Size acceptance in the queer dating community
Statistics and misconceptions about body size, dating, and marriage
The surprising percentage of straight men who don’t care about body size
How fatphobia affects dating, especially for fat women
How your mindset influences the way you date
How to navigate the dating world after being in a relationship with someone who says cruel things about your body
What to do if you’re struggling to find a therapist
Body-positive tips for creating a dating profile
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My online course, Intuitive Eating Fundamentals
Help spread the anti-diet message by subscribing to the podcast
Overcoming Overeating: How to Break the Diet/Binge Cycle and Live a Healthier, More Satisfying Life by Jane R. Hirschmann and Carol Munter (CW: some weight numbers)
When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies: Freeing Yourself from Food and Weight Obsession by Jane R. Hirschmann
Julie Duffy Dillon’s Food Psych interview about PCOS
Virgie Tovar’s Food Psych interview
Krista’s Curvy Cupid Course
BMI does not correlate with marriage rates
Research about straight men reporting that they would date a plus size woman (CW: This study may contain the use of o-words, specific numbers, and possibly other fatphobic language and images)
Krista’s free Plus-size Dating Starter Course
Listener Question of the Week
What are some strategies for coping when you are surrounded by people who are immersed in diet culture? Who are your anti-diet supporters? How can you call out diet culture in those moments? How can you connect with the anti-diet community online? What can you do after being around people who trigger you? How can you respond to diet-y comments with a different perspective? How can you set boundaries around discussing triggering topics related to food, body, and movement?
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